Thursday, April 25, 2013

Shanti.. the awareness of amazing oneness



Interacting with people gives lot of joy to me. As they come closer they confide in you a lot of things. This shows that they love you and trust you. Or if we wish to think in a different way we realize that they were trying to vent out their anguish, their guilt, their secret pain. Of late I have started feeling that everybody is nursing a secret wound. A wound that gets deposited in their minds; a dust filled one..May be from their childhood or adolescence ..some hard learned lessons which makes them harder, more reserved and makes them attached to their past. How far these wounds gets exposure to the external world depends up on how well we have trained our minds to hide things.

Whether one is confiding secrets in one’s own mind or he/she is willing to share it with someone hardly matters. Wounds remains wounds and it takes time to heal. It hurts and it pain why because that is its nature. This is how I used to think till a minute before. But now, let me assure you that there is a lot of difference between how I used to think and how I think now.

Wounds, healing, time.. all these are words and how can it possibly express something which runs deeper than it can hold. When I try to express something I would obviously be forced to make comparisons. To negate some feeling I will definitely have to invent some positive concepts and describe it with some words which are supposed to have a positive connotation. Just like for describing darkness I should be speaking about the presence of light. But remember, my trial or attempt would not be sufficient enough to convert the darkness present in to light. I mean the darkness remains.  

Desire, action, wish, will, fulfillment of wishes, what I ought to be, how I ought to be and what I am… can these be expressed with the help of these shallow words which cannot think faster than our thoughts?? A stone we recognize as a stone as our minds are trained to distinguish and name things. We have created images for things in our mind and have associated values to be. We have distinguished things to living and dead. And in the case of stone, we have categorized it under non living thing and hence identify it as valueless.

But for split second just imagine this stone converting itself into soil with passage of time and plants growing over it drawing energy from it. May be the plant grown over this soil is eaten by man and animals as their food. Again the energy that was dormant within that stone gets converted in to something. Many of us would have learned this process as part explanation for life cycle and would have treated it as a normal phenomenon.

What bothers me is not about the stone converting itself in to whatever form..What amazes me is this stones potentiality to hold life and about all the forms it already holds within. A small stone holding the secret of life I am enthralled by its capability to hold life..ENERGY. This revelation helps me to love stone as a stone.

I feel this is for us to experience this journey of discovering oneself. Rather than depending upon some ones else’s experience we have to undertake one for our own self. Stage by stage explanation of one’s journey is not possible for any one. We say that a particular person has attained enlightenment..but can that person who has attained enlightenment  really describe the process step by step for us?? Or even if he does so ; are we competent enough to grasp it or experience it.

With my new understanding I feel one with the source.. one with the creator. All my wounds are healed. Now I can smile to a stone, sing with the bees.. enjoy life as it is for what it is. The very thought that I am the source of life brings back a feeling of oneness in me. 

No comments: